The Working Woman

I've always considered myself a lady with a brain and a lady with goals and skills that would work best in the working world rather than the home.

Don't get me wrong: I've fantasized about being a stay at home wife, enjoying cable television, long yoga classes, lunches and margaritas with ladies, hitting the grocery store during non-busy hours, watching the pool boy clean. But I just can't enjoy it. I get bored.

I love having a clean house and with me at home, it gets clean. But, I'm bad at cleaning. I'm not so proficient at the Lost Housewife Arts.

I'm much better at working. And I like it more.

I enjoy the schedule, the assignments, the projects, the trips, the collaborative nature, the deadlines, the emails, the meetings, the office, the whole shebang. I love staplers and copiers and student assistants and vending machines with Dr. Pepper. I love having a place to go for the day, to get some stuff done and to come home and enjoy my leisure feeling like I've done something productive.

Especially this job. I really love my job. It's a perfect job for me, and each day is full of new challenges, new conversations with students from all over the world, new ways to advocate for students, and new international trips to plan.

I'm built for the office.

This whole pregnancy thing is tough because when I explain my plans for the future with this baby, people judge me. But it's a personal decision.

I can't tell you what you should do when you're faced with the same choice. I'm not even sure that my plan would work for anyone else.

I plan to work up until my water breaks or I'm too uncomfortable to sit at my desk or be in an office.
JUDGMENT - What? Won't you want to be home relaxing and preparing for the baby?

After the birth, I will stay home the minimum six weeks unless there is a medical reason which mandates a longer maternity leave.
JUDGMENT - Six weeks isn't long enough. You'll change your mind.

I will return to work after six weeks with the ability to take time to leave early or come late depending on the needs of my baby and my family.
JUDGMENT - You won't want to work after spending six weeks at home with your new baby. You won't want to leave him home while you spend all day away from him.

Judge away.

I'm not what you would call "maternal." I'm sure I'll grow into my role as a mother, just as I grew into being a wife. I already love my little baby, but I'm not sure that I will change who I am. I'm not sure that the birthing process will affect my pride in work or the joy I feel from accomplishing a hard day at the office.

I'm pretty scared, still, about the baby coming. There's so much I don't know. What will it be like? What will I be like? What will he be like? What will my marriage be like? What does it mean to be a mom?

I think I can be both a great mom and a great career woman.

Can't I?

This new article by Freakonomics talks about the working woman. Women can still impress the boss with a job well done and still have the ability to pick up their kids, take time for vacation and hurry home when the nanny says baby is sick. I think that's the beauty of women as equals in the workplace: we have a choice. Those who feel called to the home can choose to be stay at home moms. Those who feel called to work can return to their jobs.

I've been at my job for almost a year now, and I've built trust with my boss and my office. I will return and complete the same work with the same zeal and accuracy as before - I'll just have another cute picture to add to my desk and a sweet reason to make sure my work is done before the end of the day.

Perhaps I'm being naiive. Perhaps I'm wrong.

I've weathered several life changes, and I've remained the same me. A smarter, more experienced me, but the core of who I am is still the same. And I don't think it's too crazy to think that I will still be very much me, even as a mother.

Bryan likes to say that a happy wife is a happy marriage. I think it's true even more with a kid. I think a happy mom is a happy family.

This plan makes me happy.

I'm confident that our son will be cared for by Bryan. What a cool setup that we can give our son so much time with his father, to learn life from the most fascinating person I know. Bryan is more a man than most, and I'm so happy that our son will get so much of Bryan's influence.

I'm confident that our nanny will bring that sweet, caring love to our baby on the days when we are both at work. She's the most gentle, sweet girl I've met. I know she'll read the baby stories, sing songs, dance and love him like her own.

I'm confident that I will be a better mother knowing that I'm making global accomplishments and that I'm helping to provide for our family. I will be happy to enjoy my nights and weekends with my little baby after missing him at work.

I think it's going to work out. I'm sure there will be bumps and trouble and unexpected things, but I'm approaching this new role as mother with as much optimism and confidence that I can muster.

And I'll take all the support I can get from family, friends, coworkers and internet strangers.